The Afints
by HilariouslyInsane
Summary: April,August and Arial are 6th Year Gryffindor's and they decide to record they're day-to-day activities, for social rejects. They're life turns up-side-down when The Marauder's intertwine with their fate. Fire,Silver and Food have never been so confusing
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer; I don't own HP. If I did, I would be an evil mastermind. Mwahahahaha- Yeah, whatever.**

_**The Afints**_

**April, August, Arial**

**April's POV**

I swear I didn't do it. Who would? Alright. I did. I charmed the Great Hall to sing 'The Wizard of Oz' when Dumbles walked through. I didn't admit that Snicker's and Silver joined in though.

Oh wait. Your probably like 'Who the hell is Snicker's and Silver?' Let's Start from the Start.

Name; April Vanessa Hopes

Nickname; Appy, Sparky

Age; 15

House; Gryffindor

Dreams; To control my fire…

Hopes; To become a Pro Quittich Player

Job; Photographer for _The Hogwarts _

Song; Fearless- Taylor Swift

Friends; August Jane, Arial Jials, and The Marauders. Oh, and everyone BUT BLOODY SLYTHERINS!

That's me. I'm Crazy, Quirky, and an elemental. Sounds gay, right? But it's not. It's soooooooooooooooo much fun! My elemental is 'Fire!' so, I can control and manipulate fire. It goes so well with leather jacket. I'm on the Gryffindor Quittich Team! I play beater along with Snicker. It's fully awesome.

I'm what you would call a 'Play Person' I don't stay tied down. For one thing, I hate rope, the other, I kinda, suck at commitment.

In year two, I dumped cheese over The Marauder's head, since then, it's A PRANK WAR! Silver even practises' her evil laugh for it. It's gratifying to cackle with your friends. It's, a moving experience everytime you cackle, once Snicker ran outta breath, and we had to run to the Hospital Wing, or as we like to call it, Our Second Home.

To be honest, we're the insane lot. For instance, in multicultural studies, Snicker yelled "OH HARK! MY BABIES COMING!" It took us, half the day to realise she wasn't pregnant.

**Augusts' POV**

Did I seriously charm all the chairs to move back whenever someone sat down? Maybe I did, Maybe I didn't. …. Fine. I did. HAPPY NOW?

Haha. You're a book. La De Dah. Can you keep a secret? Yeah? Well, HA! YOU DIDN'T THINK I'D ACTUALLY TELL YOU? MWAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!

That was fun. Let me introduce myself.

I'm August. Or Snickers.

Name; August Charlotte Jane

Nickname; Snickers and Augy

Age; 15

House; Gryffindor

Dreams; To control my food cravings

Hopes; To become a Pro Quittich Player

Job; Photographer for _The Hogwarts _

Song; Are you gonna be my girl- JET!

Friends; April Hopes, Arial Jials, and The Marauders.

That's me. August. I'm a MOTHER FUCKER elemental. I control Food and such. Like, I can MAKE anything, and I can burn food and undercook it, WITHOUT TOUCHING IT! So muchos fun! Did you know I'm an animagus? Fuck. Were you ment to know that? Ah well. Cheetah's out the bag now. I'm a Fucking Cheetah. Sparky's a bloody Fox, and Silver's a sexy Gazelle. Did you know there was a werewolf a Hogwarties? We're good friends, in um, animal form anyway. It wasn't me who told you about bloody werewolf's or fucking animals.

My friends are mental. I know everyone says that, but they're my girls, we stay through thick and thin, even when Sparky fucking puts bloody ice water on me in the morning and when Silver fucking tosses me out of bed. I don't complain or argue, we _debate _by, er, throwing things.

We may or may not of burnt the hangings on our four-poster beds. Tell you something funny? We have our own separate dorm. Because the other girls were complaining that we were too annoying. Ah well. The House Elf's don't clean in our room anymore. They say it smells bad.

**Arial's POV**

I swear, I fucking didn't glue everyone to their seats.

Alright.

I fucking did.

I'm Airy-Fairy, AND I FUCKING HATE GLUE-STICKS!

I did not say that. Appy was like 'No swearing' and me and Snicker are like 'MOTHERFUCKER!' and then it turned into a elemental war. Fuck. Did I say I was an elemental? No? Well, I can control metal. That's why I'm called Sparky. Cause I CAN FUCKING CONTROL METAL! WHOOOOOO!

Name; Arial Tanya Jials

Nickname; Airy, Airy-Fairy, Silver

Age; 15

House; Gryffindor

Dreams; To make it through dinner and not break the utensils

Hopes; To become a Pro Quittich Player

Job; Model for _The Hogwarts _

Song; Our Song- Taylor Swift

Friends; August Jane, April Hopes, and The Marauders.

We bet in our group. We're betting to see how long it takes me to eat dinner without melting or destroying the utensils. It's SO fucking hard.

Once, We were in our ninja mode, and we fought with elementals, and we all tied. Not fun. Well, it's better to be equal then to be fucking controlling otherwise you have this controlling person, WHO IS FUCKING GAY, and they make the decisions take credit for the pranks, flirt with the hot guys. Blah, fucking blah.

Anyway, this is our 6th Hogwarties year, for the losers who are failing at having a social life.

Oh, Ravenclaw's ARE FUCKING SCARY SHIT WHEN YOU GIVE THEM A CHANCE.

**Miss Sparky would like to acknowledge that Ravenclaw's are funny when you stick them to benches**

_Miss Snicker's would happily agree, and seeing Slytherin's covered in pink goo, IS FUCKING HILARIOUS_

Miss Silver would like to remind Miss Snicker and Miss Sparky, THAT THIS IS HER FUCKING SPACE TO WRITE FUCKING SHIT AND THEY ARE FUCKING TAKING IT UP!

**Miss Sparky sends her compliment to Miss Silver, and bids her farewells**

_Miss Snickers sends her apologies, and will follow suit _

Sorry. Mental Friends. Pranking, Quittich, Photography, Modelling, Food, Fire and Silver get's to their head's. You know how it is. Or do you?

**A/N; Good? NO? Please R&R!**


	2. Oh, the Joy of Families

**Disclaimer; I don't own HP, or any other Characters who are mentioned in JK's books.**

_**The Afints**_

_Friday 1__st__ September_

**Augusts' POV**

Oh, The Joy of Families. Breakfast in bed, greetings that warm your soul, warm nourishing stew-

"AUGUST! WAKE UP! IT'S 10AM!" Called my ditsy 45-going-on-15 mother.

10 am? Shit. Shit. Shit. Where's my shoes? Where's my TRUNK? Oh, wait. It's packed neatly by the door, and my clothes are on my chair. Phew. For one minute I thought I was April. Hahaha. Wait. Did I pack my shoes..?

Hahaha. False Alarm. Time to get dressed I think. Hm. Black tank and ¾ leggings with knee-high grey boots. The Classic Afint outfit. Now to customize. Rainbow headband and earring with matching bangles. Very good. Very Augusty.

One hour later I'm done, and catching my taxi.

"Kings Cross Station Please" I murmur, after climbing in the backseat.

"WHA WAS THA?" bellowed the driver

"Kings Cross Station" I said, loudly

"WHA?"

.Imustremaincalm. Swearing ISN'T the answer "KINGS CROSS STATION" I yelled.

"Alrigh', Alrih'" Merlin, this guy is more daft then after my mother has drunken her way past the living present.

We pull into Kings Cross Station, and I pay him without a tip. Merlin's arse, the look he gave me after he realised I didn't give him a tip.

"Teenagers" he muttered and drove off.

Yeah, up yours too.

Besides the usual What-in-Merlins-name-is-that-person-carrying-an-owl-for? Look, I got away fine, pushing my trunk, owl and broom through the barrier. Besides waking up late, I'm nice and early.

Good. I like getting here before everyone else, so that I can claim the best compartment, without gum and rubbish littering the cabins. I swear, sometimes they're worse than our room. Which, frankly is quite frightening.

I think I'll have a nap now, nice and peaceful…

**April's POV**

MERLINS BAGGY Y-FRONTS! MY Shoe! My Shoe! I cannot find my son of a bitch, mother fucker shoe.

Oh wait, _my shoe is on my foot. _!

I'm an idiot. Thank Merlin's boxer shorts that August isn't here to be on my case. Last year, She actually PACKED THE NIGHT BEFORE! I've never met anyone so…. Organised! Wait, I take that back. Fucking Goody-two-shoes, self conscious Remus Lupin is organised. Maybe I should set them up. Isn't he dating that Janette chick? …..Meh, who cares?

Thanl Fuck's shoe that Father has left. God, I don't think I could stand another 'You are dishonouring the 'Hopes' name' blah, blah, blah. I don't give a fucking rats arse.

What's the time…? 10:30. !

Right. House Elf. I must find a House Elf.

"NIPPY! FUCK! NIPPY! WHERE ARE YOU?" I yelled, running down the marble staircase

"Here Mistress April" bowed Nippy. I love you Nippy.

"Listen, can you take me to Kings Cross Station? I'm _so late!" _

"Of Course Miss!" He grabbed my bag and my arm, and apparated me into the men's loo's

"Erm, Nippy-" but I was cut off by his abrupt departure. "Fuck"

I walked out, as dignified as I could, straightening my Black tank, leggings and converse shoes that were covered in graffiti.

Besides the What-The-Holy-Fuck-That-Dickface-Is-Carrying-an-owl-out-the-guys-loos-man looks, I was fine.

I got there in time, to chuck my stuff aboard and drop a few Dungbombs in people's pockets, shoot off a few dirty looks, and BAM! I was on the train.

I wonder where the food trolley is? I hope I can charm my way into free stuff. My allowance has been cut short by 5 galleons. Whoops. My Bad.

Hahahahaha. Found Food Trolley, but _no food trolley lady. _I wonder if I can…?

Fuck. Fuck. Fuckitty. Fuck. Fuck. THE FOOD TROLLEY IS CHARMED! If only-. Ha. What The Fuck? I'm _magical! _And I'm an elemental for Merlin's sake!

Ha. SUCK THAT FAIL WHALE! I got free liquorice wands! YAY! Go Team Afints!

Mmmm! Nice lollies. Found August snoozing. Hm. I'll just put up your normal protection wards, because frankly, SOME GUYS NAMEING NO NAMES, i.e., SIRIUS AND JAMES STOLE OUR WANDS, AND WE HAD TO _PHYSICALLY _BEAT THE LIVING CRAP OUTTA THEM, AND THANK MERLIN THAT I HATE THEM!

Poor Appy. She hates Leaving her mum. She'll be spastic tomorrow.

**Arial's POV**

Sleeping on a couch isn't that comfy. But I manage, soon enough I'll be at Hogwarties. AND I'LL HAVE REALLY COOOL MAGIC PEOPLE! HAHAHAHAHA!

Sorry. Sugar-high. Note to self, Fruit-Loops, big NO NO!

Hahahahaha.

I remember what today is!

It's The 1st of September!

Fuck.

It's September.

Fuck.

HOGWARTS! FUCK! FUCK! RUN AND PACK! RUN AND PACK! HMMM, PJ'S? YEP. SHOES? YEP. UNDERGARMENTS? YEP. TOLIETRIES? YEP.

DONE! Haha. I have a bigger IQ now! Yay! All for one, and one for a biscuit!

Now, for school.

Ugh.

10:45.

Mmmm.

10:45! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! FUCKITTY!

Floo. I'll Floo there

"Kings Cross 9 ¾ Platform!" Woosh! Flash of green smoke, feeling like your gonna chuck, and YOUR THERE!

I Stumbled out, and ran to put my stuff away.

A few Dungbombs, A few curses, A few dark looks, a few flirty winks, and BOOM! On the train. Record time.

Wandering the train for Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Doo

Ha! Found them! Snoozing. I said the counter-curse for the wards and sat down, enjoying the comfy plush seats.

Hm, I must replace the wards, I must replace the wards, I must…

**A/N; ANOTHER CHAPPIE!**


	3. Piper Toooowl

**Disclaimer; I'm only borrowing. And giving back. Unfortunately.**

_**The Afints**_

**Augusts' POV**

!

JAMES POTTER AND SIRIUS BLACK! AHHHH! IN FRONT OF ME! AHHHHH!

Breathe in. Breathe Out. Breath in. Breath Out. Phew.

Now their laughing their heads off. It's not funny. Oh, look! Remus isn't here!

"Marauders" I said, glaring at them in turn

"August" grinned Sirius

"That's Miss Jane to you" I scowled  
"Bad morning?" he asked

"Very much so" I groaned, sitting up, and looking at my best friends who were grinning in their sleep.

"Do they always do that?" James asked, gesturing towards their Cheshire Cat grin

"Always. What drives me up the wall, when they sleep walk" I muttered, rubbing my head.

"They _sleep walk?" _asked Sirius

"Totally"

"Hello August" smiled Remus as he entered the compartment

"Shh! The babies are sleeping" grinned Sirius

There was a gentle owl tapping, and they woke up with a start, April snarling like her cheetah, and Arial startled like her gazelle.

"I've seen a look like that!" exclaimed Remus

"Where would you see a look like that? I'm sure not _inside _at Hogwarts" smiled April innocently. Merlin's Pants she's a good actor.

Remus gulped and quickly changed the subject. "So, good holidays?"

"Awful" muttered April, as she rubbed her invisible bruise on her head

"What was that?" asked Sirius as he eyed the girls walking past

"Nothin" she said, stretching "Is that bet still standing?" she asked, a wicked glint in her eye

"Oh, it's on" I said, scrambling up.

"Ready, Set, GO!" cried Arial as she rushed ahead

**April's POV**

I suck at sleeping. I get about 2-3 hours a night maybe. That's why I fell asleep. I dreamt of how we first met.

"_Hopes, April" called Minnie Mouse as I walked gracefully forward. Whispers went around, well, my father is one of the richest families, and well, I was kinda nice looking. The girl who I befriended looked at my from the Slytherin table. Ew. Ew. I'm certainly not going there._

_I placed the hat on, and it greeted me "Greetings Miss Hopes"_

"_Please call me August . Miss Hopes is creepy" I thought_

"_Ok, April. Lots of courage"_

"_Okie Dokie" _

"_Shhh!"_

"_FINE!"_

"_Slytherin would be good, lots of cunning and ambition-"_

"_I swear, if you put me there, I will burn you to shreds, then feed the scraps to a shark, then chuck them in a dumpster"_

"_Then it must be- GRYFFINDOR!" the Hat cried aloud_

_I happily walked over to the cheering table, and turned around and stuck my finger up at the creepy Slytherin girl._

_I sat next to a loud bespectacled boy called James Potter. I met a Sirius Black, the white sheep, Remus Lupin, a quiet nerd, Peter Pettigrew a fat kid who was their groupie. _

_The next day, I saw Potter and Black make fun of a muggle-born girl called August Jane_

"_Leave her the motherfucker alone" I said, glaring at them_

"_Have you gone over to the dark side?" asked James looking at me with astonishment_

"_Least they have cookies" I snapped. Later, I ran into a chick called Arial Jials_

"_Sorry Morry" I said, flashing a grin_

"_S' alright. This is the fucking millionth time I've been run into, and you're the first to say Morry" she said_

"_Meh. I'm an individual. Wanna hang around with me and August?" I asked, picking up her stuff_

"_Sure!" she smiled._

Ah, My August and Arial all grown up. Ahhhh.

**Arial's POV**

Hahahaha. I LOVE bets. Cause I win. Always.

Anyway, We have a bet, trying to see who can flatter the trolley lady the most, and who can get the most lollies. Snicker's wins this one the most. This is the ONLY ONE I CAN'T WIN! AHHHH!

Right. Here we go.

"Hello Gabrielle! Nice holidays?" I asked, batting my eyes

"Oh yes Arial! The best" after a while of prattling, I finally managed to get away with a liquorice wand. When I got back, August was sitting there, munching on her pumpkin pasty

"You got a pumpkin pasty?" I asked outraged

"Yep!" she grinned happily.

A few minutes later, Snicker's arrived with _armfuls_ of stuff

"What?" asked August

"What can I say? I'm a magnet" she flicked her hair

"To women too? That's pretty scary" grinned August as she took some beans.

"Meh. Handy Andy though"

"That's a paper towel!" August said

"What's a papeeeeer toowl?" I asked, very confused

"PAP-ER TO-WEL. It's something muggles use to wipe up messes" August shook her head, as April laughed hard

"Piper toowl. What a crazy name" she said between fits of laughter

"PAPER! PAPER WOMAN! IT'S FUCKING PAPER!" snapped August

We grinned and April snapped her fingers and a bucket of cheese floated mid-air above her head. I locked the door, and window, and April waved her fingers. Before August to look up, we'd dumped the whole lot on her head.

She grinned like a mad fox, which she is, and changed into her animagus, before tackling Snicker.

April laughed like a loon on loon tablets and eventually we calmed down, talking about summers, and what's coming ahead.

"I hope that it'll be a good year, our 6th year" I said, throwing a green Berty Bott's Every flavour bean out the window.

"Oh, it will be" April did her mad cat grin and I knew, It'd be prank filled

**A/N; Good? No? PLEASE R&R!**


	4. BlackyPacky,LoonyMoony,DDProngs

**Disclaimer; I own nothing except April, August and Arial. And even then, I don't technically own them.**

_**The Afints**_

**Blacky-Packy, Loony Moony, And a drop-dead Prongs**

_Hogwarts School Of Witchcraft and Wizardry _

_Friday 1__st__ September_

**Augusts' POV**

God; I swear FIRST YEARS ARE BECOMING SHORTER AND SHORTER!

I nearly fell over one before.

This is how it went;

Me; *Gracefully exits the train*

Random midget; *Runs infront of me*

Me; *Trips over gracefully*

Random midget; *runs off*

Snicker's and Silver; *Laughs so hard it's not funny*

Remus Lupin; *Offers hand and smiles*

Me; *Takes hand and blushes*

Snicker; *Bends over laughing*

Silver; *Snorts and laughs*

Sirius; *Walks over to a now rolling on the floor laughing Snicker's and pulls her up*

Snickers; *Rolls eyes and smiles*

Silver; *Trips into Jasper Jambles, and apologises really fast*

Jasper; *Grins and shakes his head*

Snickers; *Punches Sirius with a scowl*

Sirius; *Looks disappointed*

Silver; *Smiles and walks away*

Me; *Grins and walks away from everyone*

Snickers and Silver; *Argue about midgets and dangers about them*

Sirius, Remus and James; *Stare like idiots*

**April's POV**

God how I hate Sorting. It's the Same song every year. Blah Blah Blah. Everyone knows that Gryffindor is the best. I mean, Ravenclaw's= NERDS! Slytherin's= Junior Death Eater's, Hufflepuff's= I mean, WHAT THE FUCK IS A HUFFLE, AND WHY IS PUFFY? And they're nice too. Like a I'm-gonna-smile-and-kill-you nice. It creeps me out. Like, totally.

"Hey Snicker's, rekon you can whip up some food?" God, It's Sirius. Please, _please _shut up and leave me alone

"It's April to you, _Padfoot_" I grinned evilly and watched him wither under my gaze. Oh the joys of having a killer death stare *Sigh*

Finally. Ha! Evans _is actually listening! _Oh look, She's Prefect! Fuck. So's Lupin. Gawd, If I have to hear Augusts' 'Remus Lupin is so hot' speech, I may jump off the Astronomy tower.

Jesus. How Long can this take? Seriously, WHO CARES? Haha, I remember when August got sorted

"_Jane, Augustiscillia" shouted McG, I mean, FINALLY!_

"_It's just August" I said, and her lips pushed into a stern line. Again. Fuck, let's get this over with. I placed the brown, floppy hat over my head, and hoped it didn't suck shit_

'_Sarcasm, and wit are your main two defences' said a horrible raspy voice in my head_

"_Nah Shit Sherlock" I thought, as I twiddled my thumbs. _

'_Creativity, but I think that's just sarcasm'_

"_Your just the new fucking genius you are"_

'_Miss Jane'_

"_Yepperooo?"_

'_You must be in…' "Gryffindor!" it had howled and I had flung the ew thing away, walking towards the cheering table._

"Snicker's? We can eat now" said Silver over the table, giving me her 'Jesus-woman-get-a-fucking-grip-already' and I gave her 'You-can-talk-Jasper-Jambles-Lover' look, and she gave me a 'Right-and-you-don't-like-Sirius-Black look, so I gave her a 'Fuck-I-don't-already-so-fucking-deal-with-it-so-now-let's-eat' look, and we were fine.

We're cool like that. We can talk with looks. Sometimes, I swear we're triplets.

Oh, Whatever.

! Yum! Yum! Yum! I fucking looooooooooooooove food!

….mmmmmm

**Arial's POV**

Fuck.

We're screwed.

Me, Sparky and Snicker's are standing at the bottom of the Female staircase, and it's refusing to let us is.

"YOU FUCKING SHIT THING! YOU HAVE TO FUCKING PLAY UP DON'T YOU? YOU MISERABLE SON OF A BITCH FUCKFACE THING! YOU JUST FUCKING WORRY ABOUT EVERY BUT US! WHERE THE FUCKING SHIT ARE WE MENT TO GO? FUUUUUCKKKKK!" roared Snicker's. She lives by the motto, 'When Angry, count to 4, when pissed off, or bored, swear'. She lives by a lot of motto's. One being 'Let's piss off every teacher as many times in a lifetime', Oh, I wish I could Avada Kevada her sometimes.

"Miss Hopes! No need for such language! You'll just have to share the 6th year boy dorms" scolded McG, and walked out.

_WHAT IN FUCKING VOLDEMORTS NIPPLE?_

Well, we had nowhere else to sleep, so we trooped up to our new dorm, we could hear Black, Potter and Lupin argue about the three new beds

"…I don't know Moony, I rekon we should-" said Potter, but we cut them off my banging open the door.

"Hey!" smiled Snicker's merrily as she walked in the door, smelt a bed, grinned to herself, changed the bedsheet's with a flick of her wrist to her plush black silk sheets, shoved her trunk under the bed, and flopped onto the floor.

"What the hell Hopes?" asked Black

"Ah! Hello Blacky-Packy! We're your new dorm mates!" I smiled, throwing my trunk to the bed next to Snicker's changing the sheets to my fluffy blue doona, and bending the four-poster bed into a curly bedframe.

"What?" asked Lupin

"C'mon Loony Moony, you can catch up" grinned Sparky, as she lit her bed frame alight.

"Your bed frame's alight" panicked James

"And?" asked Snicker's as she helped herself to a triple-choc biscuit that was now on her bedside table

"OO! YUMMY!" I squealed "Accio!"

"NOOO! DAMN YOU SILVER!" roared Snicker's as her platter went out her hands and into mine.

"Um, a few rules here, I should think" said Black

"Right, I agree. What about; No walking into the bathroom without knocking _SILVER! _No stealing each others stuff to show other people _BLACK! _No ice water bucket's _SPARKY! _No saying random facts in the middle of the night _LUPIN! _And no pranks in the dorm _POTTER! _Because, Hell, I can summon the biggest fucking bucket of cheese, and dump in on your head" Said Snicker's

"And no fucking complaining _SNICKERS!" _I said

"Hear Hear!" said Potter

Snicker's gave him her Drop-dead look, and he was quiet. Hell, it's gonna be one heck of a year

**A/N; R&R! **

**Oh, AND LE/JP SB/OC OC/OC RL/OC JP/OC**


End file.
